i would take no for an answer
just to know i heard you speak
and i'm wondering why i never see
the signs they claim they see
a lot of special revelations
meant for everybody but me
maybe i don't truly know you?
maybe i just simply believe..

i can sniff, i can see
and i can count up pretty high
but these faculties aren't getting me any closer to the sky
but my heart of faith keeps pounding
so i know i'm doing fine
but sometimes finding you
is just like trying to
smell the colour nine...

"beauty often seduces us on the road to truth..."

you live, you learn

love is a curious thing. when you first realize that you have the capacity to love another person, you go headfirst, headlong into a crazy whirlwind. there's no time to think, no time to calculate... you fall with wild abandon, and you love with a passion so strong; a passion that makes you want to give everything for your love. there is an excitement that comes with exploration, and a realization of feelings so pure and complex that you stumble for words to describe how you feel. every fibre of your being is infused with raw emotions and you are invincible and vulnerable all at the same time...

... as time goes by... and as you give of yourself and your heart over and over again.. you start to withdraw. a casing starts to form around what is left of your heart, and you guard it fiercely, like a lioness would guard its cubs. you love with a caution. giving away bits of yourself, but never again with the entirety of your battered heart. wounds heal, but scars don't disappear. its such a cliche, but nothing is more true.

you long for a return to eden, but you have fallen.

perhaps thats why we eventually settle down, but never are at complete rest. our souls never stop searching desperately for their counterpoint in another. or perhaps that's why so many of us are never satisfied. maybe that's why we so desperately need something to believe; to cling on to. or maybe its just a human condition to be restless.

we all need love though. billions of humans can't be wrong..